I hate being an asthmatic. I especially hate it when i catch something that's 'going around'. The average person will get an annoying cold, take their nyquil or whatever and they'll be able to get through it. I get the bug and right away it descends into my lungs, my 'twitchy airways' start doing what they do best. . constricting. I get the telltale heaviness and pressure like I have a baby elephant laying across my chest. Usually it will take about 5 - 7 days to get into this kind of trouble for me. This time 'round it only took 2. It kind of scared me how aggressive this 'whatever it is' got in there. I had a scratchy throat for a day and a half and them this incredible fatigue, like i couldn't sit upright, you know? then the cough. . the kind that burns when you cough, and aches. There there's the breathing. . . yesterday i did nothing except work my shift and sleep every chance i got. today I took a walk with Robbie and the puppy!! *Maggie!* I was gasping on level ground and that was AFTER my puffer. Pathetic. I saw the doc the other day, he had a listen and wrote me yet another prescription for Zithromax (antibiotic). I think I should get him to do a standing script order, cuz this happens to me usually once per season.
He talked to me about trying Singulair again. . (once a day pill) I tried it before, didn't seem to do much for me. He said its 50/50 . . for half of asthmatics its a wonder drug and for the others, doesn't do a thing! Figures i'd be in the latter group!!!! When I took this in addition to my puffer i was spending $160 a month on asthma medications. Thank God for drug plans and for living in a country where health care is pretty decent and accessible. What would happen to me if I couldn't afford to buy the medication that keeps me alive?!
Anyway, I'm tired again. . gotta get some rest. Sometimes i dream of being able to breathe like I used to when I was a child, before all this. I don't remember what it feels like to ever get one complete breath. I don't remember what its like to not take puffers two and three times a day. I don't know what it feels like to go for a walk in the cold without my airways closing off. I don't remember what its like to be able to withstand humidity without hiding in central aired buildings. I don't remember what it feels like to get a normal cold. I don't remember not wheezing and I hate that I don't remember all of these normal things. bah.